Tag Archives: relationships

Quote of the Week: Impersonal Engagement

This week’s quote comes from Joseph Yoo of Step by Step–a blogger I discovered through Andrew Conrad. Yoo talks about a time when he was in seminary and worked at the Korean United Methodist Church of Greater Washington. In his post, Yoo shares a story with us about a small significant moment that I think is significant still today and outside the walls of the church.

On this particular day, Yoo was helping out with the church’s youth ministry  where the youth would go out to the parks of DC and hand out sandwiches to the less fortunate. On this day though, there were more people than there were sack lunches available and the following interaction occurred:

As the kids were getting in the car, one of the homeless men came up to the passenger window of the van. Thinking he needed a sandwich, the pastor said, “Sorry, we don’t have any more sandwiches. But Jesus loves you.” The man started yelling back, “I know Jesus loves me! But what about you?”

Impersonal Engagement

Yoo goes on to say how the pastor just kept repeating the same thing: Jesus loves you. And the guy kept asking the same thing: Yes, but what about you? until the car drove off. I won’t do it justice, but Yoo goes on to talk about how impersonal things get sometimes–even when you have good intentions. And that sometimes, to truly make a difference and show you care, you have to get engaged and this may mean you have to roll-up your sleeves, get your hands dirty and get involved.

Your Challenge

Does this sound familiar? I find Yoo’s story relevant because in the world of social media–it gets easy to thank someone for a RT. It gets easy to post a photo. It gets easy to give a #followfriday shout out. It gets easy to ask them for feedback or respond to an inquiry. It’s gets easy…and impersonal. So, here’s your challenge:

Take Five Steps Back

  1. Review your communications. Look through your Twitter feed and Facebook postings. Count the number of times you have an authentic interaction with a customer versus the number of promotional postings or generic responses.
  2. Review the conversations you’ve had with customers. Have you taken the conversation to the next level? Did you answer their question?
  3. Talk to outsiders. For example, call local media–not to pitch a story. But just to ask them what they think about your organization or cause.
  4. Know your competition. Look at your competitor’s website, Twitter, Facebook, blog, etc. How are they engaging people? What can you learn from them? What gaps exist?
  5. Get outside your comfort zone. Talk to people that don’t work in your department or function within your organization. Showing people you care inside the organization will build an attitude of caring.

What else? How can we make sure we are authentically engaging people and building relationships?

Like they say: If it were easy, everyone would be doing it. Don’t be everyone. Be unique–this is how you will offer true value to your customers.

flickr credit: Matthew Yaktine

Are You Keeping the Main Thing, the Main Thing?

I don’t know about you, but this is a question that I make myself answer everyday. Of course, that means that you need to know your main thing. Preparing for marriage over the past year, I’ve found that my main thing has changed. And for me, that’s a good thing because it represents the type of person I want to be, it keeps me more focused, and in in the end, makes me better at everything else.

During one of those moments–you know, the times where you feel like everything is coming at you from all directions and you’re just not sure how you’re going to make it all work–I reached out to my friend Qui, who simply said: “Keep the main thing, the main thing.” Seven simple words that got my head to the ground working, only this time, I was healthier, happier and more productive.

Thus, I want to recognize some colleagues that I know have worked hard this past year to keep the main, the main thing.

Main Thing Keepers

  • Andre Blackman: When I first met Andre, he was living in DC as a newlywed working to balance life, marriage, work and his pursuits in public health. I’ll never forget the look on his face when I told him I was engaged, and he said: Just you wait, things will change. (How right you were friend, and I’m a better woman for it!) Fast forward to today, he’s living closer to family, moving the public health field forward and leading the charge in his role at RTI. Nice job Andre!
  • Geoff Livingston: I greatly respect Geoff’s approach to work and life. For one, I like how he integrates his love for social change pursuits into his work–nice balancing. Further, if you read his blog or follow him on Twitter, you often hear him give props to his wife. In fact, this past year, Geoff sold his company and joined the CRT/Tanaka crew. In his blog post announcing the big move, Geoff acknowledged his appreciation and renewed relationship with his wife! Even better–His first descriptor in his Twitter bio for the longest time was “husband.” To me, for someone who is so accomplished in our field, to wake up everyday and say he is a husband first, that deserves mad respect.
  • Rosetta Thurman: Admittedly, I don’t know Rosetta as well as the other two. But just read her latest post on her own personal revelations when it comes to life, love and the lure of the “career.’ Rosetta, I feel you. I use to deny kids and used to think I was destined to be single–and in fact, I was quite comfortable with that. Now, I’m in love and getting married in a couple months. Thus, I encourage you girl.
  • Bonus: Seth Godin. I don’t know him personally, but I feel it’s very easy for us in the social media field to get thrown off-course. In this video, Seth shares these sentiments and challenges us with the question: “Where are the real relationships?…Networking is so important when it’s real, and it’s always a useless distraction when it’s fake.”

Your turn. Who do you know that is keeping the main thing, the main thing? And better yet, how are they doing it?

Lessons from the Incurable Optimist

I write this post purely out of inspiration gained from one Incurable Optimist–Michael J. Fox. I knew I chose him as my favorite actor when I was 8 years old for a reason.

During Michael J. Fox’s “Adventures of an Incurable Optimist,” I found myself live-tweeting inspirational quotes, thoughts and ideas from the show. As a gift for a job well done this week, I encourage you to check out the points below and remember 1) that hope is alive and 2) it is attainable.

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“As hard as things are right now, there is something happening with people…people reaching out and helping each other.”

“Maybe that’s where hope comes from. If I could do everything, I would have no reason to be thankful for hope.”

“I’ve discovered it’s not always about winning…it’s about accepting yourself” -MJFOX (Do we do this enough? Remember to celebrate.)

Did you know that the Bhutanese officially measure GNH: Gross National Happiness. It just makes sense when you think about it. They base this on the belief that a commonality of the human experience is to be happy.

“Optimism is contagious…Happiness is contagious. You can give it out in handing out newspapers.” -Michael J. Fox

Is there a link between optimism and creativity and the arts?

“For everything this disease has taken, something of greater value has been given…After everything with Parkinson’s, I’ve learned that what’s important is always making that one step count.”

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httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sKk8Wyap7sE

“Optimists are open to alternatives in the face of adversity.”

So I ask you: Do you consider yourself to be an optimist? I think if we can attain just an ounce of the optimism, joy and connected-ness that I witness in Michael J. Fox, my mom, my friends, the dear elderly man in my building who smiles and loves the moment in a simple hello….then I think we’ll all be okay.

flickr:  Shanissinha

Your Facebook Professionalism Policy: Balancing Your Relationships On and Off the Clock

For many Gen-Yers and young professionals, Facebook started out as a social network. Then, high-schoolers were allowed in. Now, understandably, more and more people are joining that range in age – and in relationship to you. Point in case:

  • My friend recently helped her mom create a Facebook account.
  • Another commented that all her co-workers want her to become a Facebook friend.
  • According to Quantcast, in July 208, 46% of Facebook users are 18-34.
  • in July 2007, ComScore reported a 181% growth of users ages 25-34, and a 98% growth in users 35+.

Thus, with Facebook going from social status —> professional network, it begs the question, what are the new the rules of thumb for one’s Facebook account? So I asked followers on Twitter. The results:

  1. All or nothing. One of the most popular answers was to go all access with everyone. This route shows to your co-workers and professional network that you own who you are. Nothing to hide. Some also responded that this helps increase the office culture and camaraderie.
  2. Oil and water don’t mix. It gets murky. Best to keep Facebook separate. One person commented that you can come to know too much about someone and that can distract from business.
  3. Go Half and Half. Others answered saying they prefer to keep professional work colleagues and co-workers at bay by using the ‘limited profile’ feature on Facebook. Or, setting privacy settings so only certain friends or groups can see certain applications, photos or the wall.
  4. Work It. Lee Aase, on his blog, Social Media University, suggest a shortcut. While waiting for Facebook to devise a way to better differentiate relationships with a system more sophisticated than the limited profile graph, Aase suggest creating a group for your professional contacts and name it “FirstName LastName Professional Contacts.” Aase explains further on his blog. Or, use Facebook’s friend lists to differentiate Aase also suggests.

No matter what you prefer, it’s best to adopt a strategy early, be wise, cautious and careful. Even those that believed in full access agreed that in the past year, they’ve tweaked their their own personal guidelines. i.e. Adopting the self-policy that one must meet someone in their professional network in person before they cozy up on Facebook.

For me, currently, I adopt a mix between the full access and the limited profile. This is largely for one reasons:

  • I want you to get to know me. I have nothing to hide. But, I’d prefer someone get to know me in person, before just reading my profile and making assumptions or place me into some category or description of who they think I might be. It’s one thing to know someone in the office, but it’s another to befriend a person.

Some other guidelines friends mentioned through my Twitter survey. Don’t post:

  • Inappropriate pictures (nudity, over-drinking, kissing, dancing, etc.)
  • Clean up those pictures from college frat days
  • Represent who you are, but be keen to what information sparks controversy
  • Don’t use foul language
  • Review your privacy settings
  • Understand what happens to your profile when you add an application
  • When you ‘become a fan’ or join a group, understand some may not get your inner circle’s inside jokes or may think you are endorsing certain ideas/services/products
  • If you wouldn’t show it to your mom, you probably don’t want your boss to see.
  • Don’t make your profiles busy or hard to read if you want to use it for networking.

What’s your Facebook Professionalism Policy? or, what do you think of mine?

photo credit: Flickr, Amit Gupta (from Newsweek article)

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